“I love you.”
These eight letters, three words are used very intermittently in our society. However, do we really truly know what love means? What exactly is love? Can we really compress all our complex feelings into this word called “love”? When exactly is it that you notice that your feelings towards a certain person have escalated to this emotion we deem love? How can one who has never experienced “love” phrase all their feelings as “love”? All these questions are very hard to answer, but for most, these are questions that go through the mind at least once in a lifetime.
At times, it is very hard for people to differentiate their feelings of friendship from love.
At times, questions such as “Are we merely just really, really, really good friends?” and “Or is this what they call “love”?” dominate our minds.
Love ultimately has no single definition; it is certainly different for every person since every person is unique. But suddenly, one day you’ll realize, you want nothing more in this world than to be with that person. No one else fazes you like they do, no eye contact from anyone else takes you in that moment than theirs.
Every moment you live passes you by in an instant. Once you hit real life, it’s going to ramp up like never before. This is an important concept to grasp. Because dating in the “real world” is different than it is now.
One day, you may see a pretty girl at a coffee shop, in a class, at a bus stop, and your window suddenly becomes a lot smaller, the stakes a lot higher, and your chances a lot lower. Realization of life being a fleeting journey, and the possibility of ending up cold and alone, scares you out of your wits. Then you realize, the only thing that matters is if you enjoy the ride with somebody else, and you slowly begin to not care what anyone else thinks; the only thing that matters is if you make a great moment for yourself in front of her.
So you talk to the girl. You don’t try and “assess” her first, you don’t try and meet her through a mutual friend; No, you walk up to her, as a man and she as a woman, and you smile as you introduce yourself. And you see her for her, and all the wonderful things she represents, and you focus not on how you present yourself, but more on discovering the girl from the inside out, what she likes, who she is.
Because you’re never going to meet her again. Ever. You’ve got one chance to meet someone wonderful, and that’s it. More people will come and go, more chances will open up along the way, but none with her. You’ll move along the river while she stands on the never-ending shoreline. And every other pretty girl you see, everyone you meet, definitely has the potential to be someone truly perfectly special in your life. She could be someone so perfect for you, so wonderful and amazing that you’re never the same again.
Or she could not be. But the only way to know is to speak to her. If she’s just not that into you, you’re in the same position you were before, and you can look to the next pretty girl you see, smile, and introduce yourself. Because you have no “what ifs”, no “I should have had done (this) instead”, no re-do’s. Rejection is hard, but when you realize all that life has to offer, it’s not rejection, its just life. And that’s okay. Be you, live life to experience every moment, and find out who you are and what you’re really searching for. And if, in this moment, you want to go talk to a girl, walk up to her and do it. It takes a tremendous amount of courage, and it can be a waste of your time, but at least you’re a man, and at least you tried.
A very good friend of mine’s short piece. He’s a truly amazing writer. LKS